Parshas Bo

by Rabbi Shlomo Goldberg

Al Pi Darko - According to His Way
Insights into Chinuch from the Weekly Sedra

Semester break is usually a time of mixed priorities. On the one hand, theEuropean heads of Yeshiva summed up the prevalent Torah attitude towardvacations when they said "bain hazmanim, yemach shemo - semester break, mayits name be erased!" Torah is our life, we are commanded to toil in itsstudy day and night, and vacations do not seem to fit into the game plan.On the other hand, almost everyone who works in a school environment feelsaround this time that they not only want a break, but that they really needa break; and this break actually brings renewed vigor in its wake.

Perhaps the balance between these two approaches can be found in the wordsof Rav Dovid Leibowitz, ztz"l. He did not follow the common practice oftrying to cajole his students to learn during semester breaks to an extentthat he knew was beyond them. Instead, before the Yeshiva went on a break,he would mention to the students of Yeshivas Chofetz Chaim that the Torahrecognizes the notion that sometimes an activity must be temporarilyrescinded in order for it to be ultimately fulfilled. For example, Moshehad to break the first set of stone tablets in order for the second ones tobe properly respected and obeyed. Therefore, since it was certain thatduring vacation the students would be less involved in Torah story thanusual, their goal should be to ensure that the loss be for the sake of anultimate acquisition. To strive to make it a break that would enable themto return to yeshiva well rested and with renewed energy.

Vacations, when utilized in this manner, serve an important purpose. Theproblem is that it is not always possible to take a break. During the longstretches of the semester, or during one's working and child-raising years,how does one retain the strength and excitement to continue effectively?How is it possible to feel renewed, while mired in the old?

An educator in Jerusalem with decades of experience as an elementary schoolRebbe, once gave me an important piece of insight and advice. He said thatbeing a teacher was different from all other professions. Although it istrue that every person needs to fight his yetzer hara (his inclination togo against Torah values) to some extent in order to roll out of bed and goto work, a Rebbe's battle is compounded. Not only must he fight his ownnegative inclinations in order to get to school on time, he also has tofight the yetzer hara of every single one of his students, each of whomwould most likely prefer to be elsewhere! The key to success, he said, liesin the Rebbe's ability to create an environment of newness and excitement inhis classroom every single day.

Just when you thought it was safe to get back into the curriculum, everyteacher now has an added responsibility, like HaShem, to renew the world ofhis classroom every day. Rav Dessler (Vol 5, p. 24, in his book, MichtavMe'Eliyahu) quotes Rav Yeruchom, ztz"l (the spiritual leader of the MirYeshiva in pre-war Lithuanian) as recommending that "in order to educatechildren, every time, if possible, the teacher must prepare their heartsthrough some sort of external novel experience. For example, one time theyshould learn in the attic, one time in an inner room, etc. For in this way,one removes the feeling of habit." Every teacher wishes that they couldremove from the vocabulary of their students and their parents the phrase "Iam (or my child is) bored." According to Reb Yerucham, it is incumbent uponevery teacher, for the sake of the educational process, to take active stepsto create an environment in which freshness, excitement, and vigor reigns.

Still, although externalities do effect our inner workings, it is usuallynot possible to create a new environment or exciting activity for our kids,or moreover, for ourselves, every day. Maturity seems to include theability to find newness from within. The Sefas Emmes, in our sedra,explains that the feeling of boredom and habituation is the result of exileand separation from HaShem and his Torah. Redemption is therefore marked bythe clarity of knowledge that everything is an emanation of the Al-mightyhimself. Therefore, the Torah's first mitzva to the Jewish people as a wholeis "HaChodesh hazeh lachem, Rosh Chodashim - this month is to you the firstof the months." The essence of this mitzvah, he writes, is for a Jew toawaken a sense of renewal in himself, through a clear, steadfast belief inhis heart that everything is from HaShem. One who loses his sense ofclarity on this crucial issue, falls into the realm of nature, where whathappens today is a replay of yesterday's unchanging, natural laws. One whostrengthens his belief in HaShem, however, realizes that today is not boundby yesterday, that one can rise from the depths to the heights in one momentof truthful realization, and that each of us lives in a designer world ofunlimited potential for growth and change.

Faith in the Al-mighty is one path toward renewal. In parashas ChayeiSarah, the Sefas Emmes gives additional advice. The Torah states that"Avraham was old, and he came with his days." The nature of a person, heexplains, is to become awakened and inspired by new insights andexperiences. However, human nature also causes these feelings to wane withtime. If one desires to "come with his days," then he must learn, likeAvaraham did, to freeze the thoughts and feelings of insight and inspirationthat we merit to glean from time to time in our lives. This ability, hewrites, is included in the commandment that we guard ourselves, lest weforget what our eyes saw at Mount Sinai. Every life event that brings us afeeling of closeness to HaShem, is a Mount Sinai experience in miniature.Therefore we are commanded to take steps to insure that we remember theseexperiences all of the days of our lives.

Therefore, we must learn to recognize these moments when they are happening,and freeze their memory for use at times when we are not feeling soinspired. For example, when a child is young, we should memorize the beautyof his face, the softness of his cheeks, the warmth of his hug, etc.,because before we know it, we will be walking him or her to the weddingcanopy! One should also collect souvenirs, since tangible reminders helprecreate the feeling of newness and inspiration that once existed. Yearsago I used to learn the Book of Isaiah on the bus home from yeshiva to ourapartment in Jerusalem. I recently opened this book and found an old busticket that I had used as a bookmark. I was immediately transported back adecade-and-a-half to a seat in the back of the #36 bus! Souvenirs do nothave to be fancy (a bus ticket will suffice), but they should be plentiful.

Rav Yerucahm and the Sefas Emmes both point to the existence of intellectualrenewal as well. Rav Yerucham writes that every teacher should bring fortha new insight in logic and reasoning in his lecture. This intellectualexcitement prepares the mind of the student to retain the more prosaicaspects of the lesson as well. The Sefas Emmes points out that it is forthis reason that children remember what they are learning better than adultsdo. Since for children the subject is new, it is like writing on fresh,clean paper upon which a long lasting impression can be made.

Finally, the Sefas Emmes advises all of us that if we are to avoid burnout,we need to turn away from the external and superficial, and focus on theinternal and meaningful. It is the nature of all things physical to witherand die under the forces of nature. Habit and boredom do to the spiritualwhat rot and decay to the material. Therefore, to the extent that we focusupon the eternal spiritual elements of our actions, the mitzvah quotient,then we will have the strength to continue. If we work, cook, clean, etc.for the chessed and not for the money, we will be happier and moresuccessful in the long run.

So enjoy your vacation. Take a break. Come back renewed. And let's do ourbest to internalize that sense of renewal, so that we "come with our days,"recall our personal revelations, and thereby make the months that follow,"lachem," months that our truly ours.

Parsha-Parenting, Copyright (c) 1999 by Rabbi Shlomo Goldberg andProject Genesis, Inc. Rabbi Goldberg is the menahel (spiritual advisor) ofYeshivas Ohr Eliyahu, and a highly acclaimed and popular speaker inLos Angeles.