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Think Of Me

By Rabbi Raymond Beyda

An infant living in the tiny confines of a crib is under the mistaken impression that the universe resolves around him. As a teenager many will not leave the house for fear that everyone will immediately notice the pimple on his or her forehead. As a person ages, the syndrome changes from everyone is watching to no one cares and attempts are made to do and say the things (and buy the products) that will attract attention.

No man is an island and neither is a woman. Every one is part of society. Membership in the human race pressures people to conform ­ to try and gain approval from others -- about what one wears, drives, says and even thinks. An individual lives in a world full of self-imposed fears and doubts generated by a feeling that “every one is watching me and what will the neighbors think”.

Worrying about what others think about you can be a great source of dissatisfaction with an otherwise beautiful life. The truth of the matter is most people are much more self-centered that you might imagine. They not only are not worried about what you think they don’t really think about you.

Today when your life is inhibited by what others might think remember that the neighbors don’t really evaluate your behavior as much as you might want them to care about it. Go on do what your values tell you are the correct thing to do. Redirect your focus and look inside rather than out -- it will yield real freedom to enjoy your day in the way you would like to spend it.


If one ate one ounce of fruit or vegetables within approximately 7-8 minutes-- except for the 5 species for which the Land of Israel is known ­ and any foodstuff that does not grow in the ground ­ like eggs, meat etc. ­ one should recite the final blessing called “Boreh Nefashot”. The same blessing is recited after drinking approximately 3.3 ounces of water or other drinks -- except for wine ­ if the drink was drunk quickly. If one sips the drink over an extended time period no final blessing is said. If one had a combination of foods that added up to the one ounce minimum or liquids that added up to the 3.3 ounce minimum then one final blessing is said to cover all the different items. [Source Yalkut Yosef, Vol. 3, Siman207: 1]


The Gemara discusses matters regarding Tefillin. One should be careful that the headpiece is worn in a way where the knot in the back of the head is above the bone that separates the bottom of the skull and the top of the neck [i.e. on the head not the neck]. That knot should also be centered in the back of the head.

When one is performing the commandment of Tefillin one should place the strap in position on the muscle loosely ­then the blessing is recited ­ then the strap is tightened. In this way the person says the blessing in the proper time, which is immediately BEFORE the tightening of the strap [known as Over Le Asiyatan].

The Gemara warns that one should not speak between the donning of the Tefillin of the arm and the donning of the Tefillin for the head. {Menahot 35b}

Raymond J Beyda

Text Copyright © 2004 by Rabbi Raymond Beyda and



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