Does teshuva undo every sin -- or are there some that are simply too
egregious or complicated to be forgiven outright?
Let's start off by reiterating a fundamental truism about sins. There are
two
kinds over all: those committed against G-d, and those against others. You
can easily enough do teshuvah for the sins you committed against G-d by
realizing what you did and engaging in heartfelt teshuva. But there's a
certain motif
it would help to follow, we learn. You're to repent the way you sinned,
measure for measure.
So if, as Ibn Pakudah words it, you "bore evil in your heart or mind by
harboring resentment against another, being jealous of him or her, hating
someone,
etc., you'd repent by improving your disposition, loving to do good for
others
and by forgiving them." That's to say that you're to use the very obverse
of
your original inclination to rectify it, by turning enmity around to love,
and
the like. (Notice, by the way, that harboring resentment, being jealous,
hating someone and the like are cited as sins against G-d, not others!
Why?
Because while you hadn't done anything outright to another, so you
couldn't be said
to have sinned against him or her, you'd nonetheless sustained motions
that
are anathema to the worship of G-d.)
"If you sinned physically by eating something the Creator forbade you to
eat,
... by profaning the Sabbath or the Holy Days" and the like, we're told,
then
you're to "repent for that particular sin and for others of the sort, then
devote your heart to fulfilling Gd's will."
Now, that's easy enough to do if G-d grants you the health, well-being,
and
length-of-days you'd need. But other phenomena and requirements factor-in
when
you have to do teshuva for sins you'd committed against others.
For as Ibn Pakudah lays it out, "your victim may not be accessible, or he
may
be dead or far away by then; you may have lost the money (you'd stolen
from
him) and have no means of replacing it; your victim may not forgive you
for
defrauding, harming or speaking against him (which you'd need him to do to
truly
be forgiven); you might not recognize your victim or know the exact amount
of
money in question ... ; or the money might have become mixed in with other
perfectly legal money, and it might not be easy to extract (the money in
question) without a serious loss of your other, perfectly legal money" and
the like.
Other, more internal things could happen to possibly thwart teshuva You
might
become so *used to committing the sin*, and it might have become so second
nature to you that you'd find it very hard to overturn it.
And your teshuva can also be hampered, Ibn Pakudah also points out, if
you'd
shed blood or murdered someone, for after all, you can't necessarily
restore
anyone's health, or bring anyone back to life; if money was lost because
of
something slanderous you'd said against someone and you can't restore it;
if
you'd borne an illegitimate child, who obviously can't be undone; if you'd
grown
accustomed to lying, insulting or speaking against people and can't keep
track
of what you said in order to make restitution; if you've forgotten whom
you
spoke against; and the like.
So what's a well-meaning person who has indeed come to realize the depth
and
span of his sins to do, knowing all this? We'll see next time.
