Rabbi Frand on Parshas Chayei Sarah
These divrei Torah were adapted from the hashkafa portion of Rabbi Yissocher
Frand's Commuter Chavrusah Tapes on the weekly portion: Tape #392 Purchasing
A Burial Plot. Good Shabbos!
"We Will Take Care Of It" Does Not Satisfy Avraham
Avraham Avinu came to the Children of Ches and asked for a burial plot to
bury his dead wife. They guaranteed that he would not have a problem
finding a burial plot, saying, "You are a prince of G-d in our midst; in
the choicest of our burial places bury your dead, not one of us will
withhold his burial place from you, from burying your dead." [Bereshis:
23:6] Avraham then asked for a specific person and a specific plot -- the
Double Cave (Me'aras Hamachpelah) that belonged to Efron ben Zochar.
The Chofetz Chaim points out that this Biblical narration illustrates one
of the great truths of life: nothing ever happens by committee. Whenever
something is a communal responsibility or "in committee" such that
everyone is responsible for accomplishing something, it is never
completed. Each person in the community feels that the other person will
wind up doing it.
When the offer was in the form of "no man in our midst will refuse you the
right to bury your dead in his piece of land", Avraham was not satisfied.
Everyone was thinking "He," not "Me." Avraham insisted on dealing with a
specific person over a specific piece of land.
Unfortunately, this is very true of communal life in general. Often, the
only way to accomplish anything is to do it yourself. The guarantee of "no
man from our group will refuse you" did not satisfy Avraham: "I have to
know specifically who the 'We' is and who is going to make this
transaction, because that is the only way anything is ever accomplished."
Insights From Avraham's Funeral
The Torah says that Avraham was buried by his two sons -- Yitzchak and
Yishmael [25:9]. Rashi, based on the Gemara [Bava Basra 16b], says that we
see from the sequence of names in this verse that Yishmael repented from
his evil ways that previously caused Avraham to banish him from his house.
Yishmael had returned to the house, yet he deferred to Yitzchak and gave
him the primary role in the burial of Avraham.
Rav Schwab asked why the Gemarah had to wait until this pasuk, in Chayei
Sarah, to prove that Yishmael repented. There is an earlier proof that
Yishamael had been taken back into the household of Avraham. On the way to
the Akeidah, Avraham took Yitzchak and his two lads. Our Sages say that the
two lads were Eliezer and Yishamael. So many years prior to Avraham's death,
we already saw that Yishmael and his father were reconciled, after the
former had presumably repented.
Rav Schwab suggested that the second proof is a better proof of Yishmael's
repentance. It is possible that as long as Avraham Avinu was alive,
Yishmael was on "good behavior," but his external actions did not reflect
his true feelings. Now that Avraham was dead and Yishmael still deferred
to Yitzchak, we know that he had sincerely repented.
Rav Simcha Zissel Brody (the Rosh HaYeshiva of the Chevron Yeshiva) has a
different approach. He says that our pasuk in Chayei Sarah is the only
definite proof that Yishmael repented. The original action of Yishmael which
frightened Sarah and prompted her to urge Yishamael's banishment was the
fact that Yishmael was mocking Yitzchak [Bereshis 21:9] "as a slave mocking
his master." Sarah saw terrible character traits, terrible impudence on
Yishamael's part. Despite the fact that _he_ was the son of the concubine
and had an inferior status in the household, he treated his brother Yitzchak
as if Yitzchak had the inferior status. It was the lack of his Derech Eretz
[proper respect and behavior], as much as any particular action on his part,
which convinced Sarah that he could not remain together with Yitzchak in one
household.
Consequently, Rav Simcha Zissel says, the only acceptable proof that
Yishmael repented of his former ways is an incident that demonstrated
Yishmael showing proper Derech Eretz towards Yitzchak. That proof is in our
pasuk, where Yishmael let Yitzchak walk ahead of him in Avraham's funeral
procession, despite the fact that Yishamael was older. Therefore, our Sages
can say unequivocally, that we see from the sequence of names in our pasuk
that Yishmael did Teshuvah [repented from his evil ways].
This write-up was adapted from the hashkafa portion of Rabbi Yissocher
Frand's Commuter Chavrusah Torah Tape series on the weekly Torah portion.
The complete list of halachic topics covered in this series for Parshas
Chayei Sarah are provided below:
Also Available: Mesorah / Artscroll has published a collection
of Rabbi Frand's essays. The book is entitled:
