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Hilchot Lashon Hara Review, Part 3: When Speaking Lashon Hara is Permitted
Thank you to David Solomon for this review
material, which was part of his class for BMT students in Jerusalem in
1993.
- Circumstances Under Which Speaking Lashon Hara is Permitted
- The Seven Conditions
- Additional Guidelines for Speaking Lashon Hara
This is the third of three review classes on Hilchot Lashon Hara, followed
by three on Hilchot Rechilut.
Hilchot Lashon Hara Review: Part 3
In "Chafetz Chaim: A Lesson a Day" p. 132, Rabbi Yitzchak Berkowitz lists
the major categories of constructive purposes for which Lashon Hara may
be spoken:
- To influence the subject to improve by discussing his faults
with someone who can help him.
- To prevent someone from being harmed by the subject, or help
someone who was already harmed by the subject.
- To help end a dispute between individuals which could escalate
to the community level.
- To help others learn from the subject's mistakes.
Before speaking Lashon Hara for a constructive purpose, the
following seven conditions must be met:
- The information spoken must be completely true and witnessed or
verified by the speaker. If it is impossible to verify the information
yet necessary that it be passed on, the speaker must preface his remarks
with a warning that the information is only hearsay and not definitely
true.
- The issue must be a problem (e.g. transgression, relevant character
flaw or bad behavior) from an objective viewpoint, not merely a preference
or sensitivity. (For example, if a store openly encourages shoppers to
sample the new grape shipment, and someone takes a few grapes rather than
exactly one, it would be incorrect to consider him "greedy" or "a thief.")
- The speaker must first rebuke the subject directly, in a kind and
gentle way which is likely to have an influence. (If the subject will not
listen to any rebuke, or if trying to rebuke him can make the Lashon Hara
ineffective, refer to ch. 10 in Hilchot Lashon Hara and ch. 9 in Hilchot Rechilut
for the Chafetz Chaim's treatment of the subject.)
- The information cannot be exaggerated or embellished, even if it's the
only way to get the listener to heed the information.
- The intention of the speaker must be purely to help in the situation,
not to degrade the subject or cause him shame.
- If the constructive purpose intended by the speaker can be achieved in
a way other than speaking Lashon Hara, the speaker should resort to that other
method.
- Any damage that is caused to the subject as a result of the Lashon Hara should
not exceed that which would be decreed by a Beit Din (Jewish court) if the
case were reviewed there. This is difficult to evaluate, so that
situations that impact the livelihood or other areas of the subject should
be referred to a Beit Din.
When someone either speaks or requests Lashon Hara for constructive purposes, they
should state the constructive purpose. Otherwise, the other party in the
conversation will think they are speaking Lashon Hara without any halachic
justification.
Also, it would be foolish to include the subject's enemies in a
constructive discussion. Not only would they be unlikely to have truly
constructive intentions in handling the information, but hey might also
add false or exaggerated information to the con versation due to their
strong feelings against the subject.
Finally, it is important to think about the listener of the Lashon Hara. It is
forbidden for the listener to believe or accept the information as true;
they can only suspect the information in order to take proper precautions
or to bring the issue to a Beit Din for resolution. Also, it would be
forbidden for the listener to carelessly circulate the Lashon Hara out of anger or
disgust, since that would violate condition (5) above. When possible, the
speaker should preface his remarks with instructions reflecting these
concerns; if the listener would not heed such instructions, the speaker
should consult his Rabbinic authority before relating the Lashon Hara.
When someone either speaks or requests Lashon Hara for constructive purposes,
they should state the constructive purpose. Otherwise, the other party in
the conversation will think they are speaking Lashon Hara without any
halachic justification.
Also, it would be foolish to include the subject's enemies in a constructive
discussion. Not only would they be unlikely to have truly constructive
intentions in handling the information, but hey might also add false or
exaggerated information to the con versation due to their strong feelings
against the subject.
Finally, it is important to think about the listener of the Lashon Hara. It
is forbidden for the listener to believe or accept the information as true;
they can only suspect the information in order to take proper precautions or
to bring the issue to a Beit Din for resolution. Also, it would be forbidden
for the listener to carelessly circulate the Lashon Hara out of anger or
disgust, since that would violate condition 5, to have purely constructive
intent. When possible, the speaker should preface his remarks with
instructions reflecting these concerns; if the listener would not heed such
instructions, the speaker should consult a Rabbi.
HaLashon, Copyright (c) 1996, 2002 by Ellen Solomon and Project Genesis, Inc.
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